Then came the holidays, then I had some very tough business deadlines to meet....blah, blah, blah. So, when the most recent business deadline was met I said "Yay- now I can restart my 30 day challenge".
Then..........hubby's most recent heart procedure failed, and we found out he will be having yet another heart surgery on April 3rd. So then I said to myself "okay, let me just get through this next surgery, and all that entails...(working 2-3 weeks ahead in my job, getting caught up in the house, the things I need to have in place to make this time run more smoothly)etc, then after that I can restart the challenge."
Well ladies, that is just not going to work. If any of you have had an ill spouse, parent or child, then I know you can relate. I love my sweetheart dearly. Having said that, the truth is, we are starting year 15 of his ongoing health issues (heart, cancer, heart again) More than ever, I need self care.
So, instead of restarting the health and fitness challenge, I am going to start the 30 day self care challenge, RIGHT NOW, TONIGHT. I am not complaining, and I want this to be a forum where we share and build each other up, but I would just like to know someone can relate. And if you are in a similar situation, I want you to know that I can relate. I know I am not alone in this. Is there anyone at all who is able to just say "I've been there"? The emotional rollercoaster is exhausting. I am a life coach for heaven's sake. My job is helping other women to navigate their life's journey personally and professionally, so at the risk of totally losing my credibility,.
I am just going to say it.....I AM EMOTIONALLY EXHAUSTED at this moment.......there I said it ......publicly....to all of you. ( well, not really publicly, this is a private group.) I cannot wait another couple of weeks for extreme self care. I was going to ride the peloton, then work until midnight, but instead, I am going to light some candles, run myself a hot bath, and allow myself to cry the tears I have been holding back for weeks.
It's not a pity party, it's therapy. Did you know that when we cry, our tears are full of cortisol( the stress hormone)? That is why we usually feel so much better after a good cry...we are physically releasing stress. So this is DAY 1 of my 30 day self care challenge. I am going to take a bath and cry:):):) Hugs to all of you, and before I begin that cry, I am going spend a few minutes in a quite state sending love, light, joy and healing to each and every one of you:)
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